Dean of Peking University Examination and Research Institute interviewed Xueba.
What is the life direction of these "cow children"?
Author: Qin Chunhua
□ Education has been simplified into a straight line for further studies. All the processes exist only for that final result: going to Peking University or Harvard. No one told these children what to do after going to Peking University or Harvard. Since then, life has been smooth, and we will never encounter all kinds of troubles, difficulties and hardships?
-just busy looking for what kind of school for children, what kind of teachers to find, what kind of conditions to provide for children, how much knowledge to teach students, and how many marks to improve students are all lazy practices, and in fact they have given up their educational responsibilities as parents and teachers.
□ Life is a journey of discovering yourself, and the road has to come out step by step. Realizing what kind of person you will become in the future is like a lighthouse in the distance, which can constantly illuminate the way forward.
In the first half of this year, I went to Shanghai to interview students. The students have made very serious preparations, one by one, just like the application materials provided by them. Without exception, every student has excellent academic performance — — At least in the top 5% of the grade; Outstanding artistic expertise — — At least one musical instrument; Won awards for scientific and technological innovation at all levels — — At least the second prize at the municipal level; Enthusiastic about public welfare — — Go to the nursing home to wash the feet of the elderly at least once; Wait a minute. While lamenting the high comprehensive quality of Shanghai students, I also have a faint regret: they look so perfect that they don’t seem to see any shortcomings; They look so alike, just like a set of "furniture" made by a mold.
Including their performance in the interview is also very similar. One by one, sitting in danger, smiling without showing teeth; Speak clearly and cadently, as if reciting a poem affectionately. A student came up and said, "Confucius said … …” I interrupted him and asked him what his name was. After he told me, he went on to say "Zi Yue". I interrupted him again and told him that I didn’t care how to say it, but what I cared about was what you wanted to say. He blushed and couldn’t say a word. Another student sat confidently in front of me, waiting for me to ask all kinds of possible questions, as if everything was under control. I said, I don’t have any questions for you. Do you have any questions for me? She didn’t expect me to ask such a question at all, and suddenly she panicked and was tongue-tied and almost cried.
Obviously, all the students have received some interview training before coming, and at least have seen some "treasure books" on how to deal with the interview, but perhaps no one told them that I am not interested in who they are, but who they really are.
What surprises me most is that when I ask them what kind of person you want to be in the future, few people can answer. The students told me that they didn’t think about it at all.
Really never thought about it? Actually, it is not. He (she) once thought about this question, but it was a long time ago, so long that he (she) even forgot it.
When I was a child, whenever an adult asked a child, what do you want to be when you grow up? Children always answer happily: scientists, astronauts, pilots, police uncles (aunts) … … However, when the children go to school, these problems are never mentioned again, as if they never appeared. Listening to lectures in class, doing homework at home and attending remedial classes are the whole life of students. As for what children’s interests are, what kind of people they want to be when they grow up and what kind of life they live, no one seems to care, even the children themselves don’t care. Almost all teachers, parents and students only care about one thing: how many points they got in the exam and what school they can go to.
A growth track that is recognized as a good student, or a perfect education roadmap imagined by parents, looks like this: go to the best kindergarten in the local area; I knew a lot of Chinese characters before I went to primary school, I can do complex math problems, I can recite many classic articles in large paragraphs, and I speak fluent English. Then go to the best local primary and secondary schools; Admitted to the best university in China — — Peking University, Tsinghua; Go to the best university in the world after graduation — — Harvard, wait. Of course, many people have been aiming at famous schools such as Eton and Exeter since junior high school. Not to mention that not everyone can achieve these goals, even if all of them are achieved, then what? Where is the goal of life?
I really want to ask: what will happen after being admitted to Peking University?
This is not my imagination. Over the years, I have seen many excellent children all over the world. They are all talented, hardworking, and have never failed. They are always among the top groups of their peers, choosing the best schools and classes, and they are the envy of others. However, few people can observe their inner pain and confusion.
Many students from Peking University or Harvard told me that going to Peking University or Harvard was their goal since childhood, but one day when they were really in the campus that appeared in their dreams for countless times, they often fell into deep anxiety: What should they do next? Like a mountaineer’s confusion on Mount Everest: Where is the next mountain?
Life needs goals, but society, schools and families have not taught children how to find and set their own goals. Our understanding of life and education is too simple and lacking in imagination. We always ask our children to be successful, to be better than others, and to be admitted to the best school, but we rarely tell them what success means, where the happiness of life comes from, and what is best for them. Education has been simplified into a straight line for further studies. All the processes exist only for that final result: going to Peking University or Harvard. No one told these children what to do after going to Peking University or Harvard. Since then, life has been smooth, and we will never encounter all kinds of troubles, difficulties and hardships? In 1923, Mr. Lu Xun once thought-provoking asked: "What happened after Nora left?" I also want to ask: "What happened after I was admitted to Peking University?"
Going to school is to get a good education, but just as savings can’t be automatically converted into investment, going to school doesn’t necessarily mean getting a good education. The reason why we send our children to school is not because they have to go to school, but because they have to be fully prepared for their future lives. Going to school is a process that a person must go through in order to achieve his life goals. In this process, the most important thing is to realize what kind of person you will become in the future.
It is not easy to do this. Everyone comes to the world with a unique mission, which is the value of independent individuals. The difference is that some people can find their mission and finally achieve great things; Some people don’t find their mission, and they end up doing nothing and living a lifetime. Just like marriage, "a radish is a pit", and everyone has their own "uniqueness". Some people find the "only" that matches them, and their marriage is happy; Some people don’t find it, and marriage is not happy, at least not happy.
Although a person’s life is long and there seem to be many things to do, there is only one thing that can really be done. This is a person’s mission to the world. Discover that the mission cannot rely on the "apocalypse" — — Although many people do suddenly realize their mission in their dreams or flashes of light — — Education is the most important and fundamental means. The value of education lies in awakening the potential in every child’s heart and helping them find the special mission hidden in the body and the thing they are destined to do.
This is the real challenge that every school and every family faces in education. It is more important and fundamental to know what kind of person you will become in the future than which school you go to and how many points you get. Avoiding or ignoring this problem, just being busy with what kind of school to find for children, what kind of teachers to find, what kind of conditions to provide for children, how much knowledge to teach students, and how many marks to improve students are all lazy practices, and in fact giving up the educational responsibility as parents and teachers.
In fact, once a child realizes what kind of person he will be in the future, he will inspire endless motivation from his heart to strive to achieve his goals. Numerous research results have proved that this endogenous driving force is far greater and more effective than the externally imposed force for human growth. We should be soberly aware that life is not a game designed by others. As long as we invest time and money and configure more powerful "equipment", we can get through customs. Once the customs clearance is completed and the game is over, life will immediately face a situation where there is no way out. Life is a journey of self-discovery, and the road depends on yourself step by step. Realizing what kind of person you will become in the future is like a lighthouse in the distance, which can constantly illuminate the way forward.
Know what you like? Make a negative list first.
So, how can we know what kind of person we will become in the future? In other words, how can we find the special potential in our life? Everyone’s methods may be different, but the most important thing is to listen to your inner voice, find your real interest and realize why your life will come, just like Steve Jobs who was born for Apple.
Generally speaking, an excellent person will never do anything too badly. The real difficulty is to distinguish whether it is something you really like. The way to judge whether you really like it or not is very simple, that is, whether you are obsessed with it, whether you can willingly devote time and energy to it regardless of utility and stick to it all the time. True obsession is a state of lovesickness. I think about it during the day and at night, even dreaming. I can’t help laughing when I think of him (her). I will think of him (her) when I see anything, and all I talk to others is him (her). I am excited about it, crazy about it, and even crazy about it. It is a state of immersion in happiness. "If you don’t go crazy, you won’t survive." If you don’t reach this state, you won’t be obsessed, and you won’t be really interested.
I suggest that every student, no matter how heavy his schoolwork is, must spare some time to be alone every day, leave a little gentle space for his mind, and listen to his deep desire in a completely relaxed state. Sometimes, you can take out a blank sheet of paper and write down your thoughts. No matter how naive, ridiculous or even shocking these ideas seem, it doesn’t matter. Anyway, they are written for themselves and have nothing to do with others.
Some people say that I just don’t feel anything, I don’t know what I like or even what I don’t like. What should I do? A good way is trial and error. Keep trying everything, and get rid of things you don’t like in the process of trying. Make yourself a negative list. Don’t be afraid of failure. For students, the cost of failure is very small. As long as they are not expelled or dropped out of school, they can return to the classroom and start all over again.
Be patient with yourself. Not everyone can find their "the only thrill", which takes time and effort. Don’t worry when you can’t find it, take your time, but you must keep looking for it. You may not find it if you look for it, but you won’t find it if you don’t look for it. At the same time, we should have confidence in ourselves. Since you are here for this matter, no one can steal it. It doesn’t matter if you find it earlier or later. The important thing is that you like it from your heart. Remember the American Grandma Moses who picked up a paintbrush at the age of 77? Her story tells us that as long as you really like to do something, you can start at any time, even if you are 80 years old.
Life is not only a life, but also a quality life. Judging whether a life has quality depends on whether every day is the day you really want. "If you hear the Tao, you will die in the evening." As long as you find something you really like, even for one day, it is a happy and quality life.
(The author is Dean of Peking University Examination and Research Institute)